Grads chose between filet steak and fresh salmon, and were treated to a sumptuous main course and desert. What most of the grads will remember from that night is not, however, the wonderful food, but the words that were spoken in that Tudor inn by their peers and Mrs. A Lifer from each house gave a speech in remembrance of the years gone by, and the speeches truly brought us all back to those first Grade 8 days: the confusion, the tingling of nerves, excitement for the challenges and opportunities that seem so wonderful when one first begins as a student at Brentwood.

The speakers chosen were certainly seasoned in their trade.

Anastasia Kosteckyj, Debate Captain, tournament champion, and rower, gave the speech for Allard house. Chris Wong, the man of few but vital words represented Whittall. And likely the most notable speech heard that night came from Mairi Horth of Mackenzie house, who embodied the meaning of Lifer perhaps greater than any other that night. Through the years she has transformed into a fantastic soccer player, academic, and socialite, and so entertained the party that night that she has now been chosen to be Valedictorian for the graduating class.

Such a story is common among those who are graduating from the lifer group this year. November 5, Retrieved June 8, March 11, Retrieved November 9, — via YouTube.

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How an Alberta researcher’s discovery of hepatitis C led to the Nobel Prize and saved lives

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June 22, Retrieved August 24, City Literary Institute. Retrieved January 27, Library of Congress. May 20, Retrieved May 8, Yet the affliction that I have observed threatens children of the wealthy as well as children of the poor. It is true, of course, that the danger wears many faces; and in critical ways the faces that it wears in our poorer communities are more menacing. Or, a bit more precisely, it is one interconnected web of problems that define a common pattern.

A term that I use to capture the interconnected web is demoralization. The notion of demoralization places the source of our predicament squarely in that nebulous domain called culture. Critics of modern culture have shown how the rise of unbridled individualism and egoism have undermined our long-standing sense of moral commitment. Although I indeed do see this as part of the problem, my focus in the present book is not on the misplaced cultural values themselves, nor on their overall societal effects.

There has been enough written on those scores already. Rather, my focus in this book is on a specific set of misconceptions about children and the damaging childrearing practices that result from these misconceptions.

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Modern cultural sensibilities no doubt have fostered some of these misconceptions; and these same sensibilities also have sheltered the misconceptions from critical examination. In turn, the misconceptions now play a significant role in nourishing certain modern leanings, such as unabashed egoism, by ensuring their transmission across generations.

Apart from their links to general cultural sensibilities, the misconceptions have an origin and a life of their own.

In fact one of the many ironies that I shall be discussing is that parents who disdain egoistic values, and whose explicit goal is to raise their children with a strong sense of social responsibility, often make parenting choices that lead their children in the opposite direction from the one they intend. My original working title for this book was With best intentions, because I believe that there are no villains in this story, only many unintended casualties.

The errors that trouble me are not the product of hatefulness or calculated mischief. To the contrary, most adults in our society have a genuine concern for the younger generation. But it is a concern led astray by popular misconceptions about the nature of children and their developmental needs. When led too far astray, as I have seen it on too many occasions, this concern can turn into a misguided attempt to shield children from the formative challenges of responsibility and reality.

The consequences for children, for their senses of self, for their spirits of initiative, and for their moral fibre, are serious and lamentable. This is why I was tempted by the associations with my first working title: roads paved with good intentions can indeed lead to unfortunate places. In the end, though, this seemed a bit too apocalyptic, even for my current mood.